"Differential Diagnosis"

I don’t understand funk-ridden people! Don’t get me wrong, I understand the whole ’scruffy, I just got outta bed look’ but its possible to achieve that look while maintaining a decent level of hygiene. Having had the absolute “privilege” of working alongside various degrees of funk throughout my years, I more than anyone understand the importance of a good shower.

One year it was an computer tech who made it seem as if he didn’t shower or brush his teeth. His presence was unmistakably known to anyone in the same room, and it wasn’t just hurting his professional image, but it was hurting his performance because customers and staff members alike would avoid dealing with him as much as possible.

At another location, I worked with someone who constantly reeked of wet cigarettes and stale beer. His hair was an oil ridden, dandruff spewing, half balding “I’m still cool” pony-tail that would occasionally be dyed a color the staff dubbed “piss-yellow.” His work space was littered with specs of dandruff, his PC and phone developed layers of what I think is a nicotine and skin cell mixture. People were afraid to even venture into his office cubicle!

My time as a bank teller exposed me to some nasty folks as well, but one in particular stands out above the rest even years after leaving. This customer came once a week smelling as if his mouth were fermenting its own brand of moonshine. Add on top of that some high levels of BO, and a very small space dividing tellers and customers…and you’ve got cruel and unusual working conditions. The tellers fortune enough to spot this man before his arrival would either delay themselves with their current customer to avoid the man, or if no other customers were present, some would take that time to excuse themselves for various other reasons.

I understand sometimes people fall into economic hardships, especially with our current economy, but really? You can’t afford a bar of soap and some running water? There are places even in this small town that offers public showering facilities! I fail to see how someone can care so little about hygiene and go on about their business as if nothing was wrong. Merely recalling some of these funk-ridden people has made me feel dirty all over, *shudder* I’m off to shower.

*Note: This post was heavily inspired by Michael Ferraro’s post on the same topic.

1. Michael Ferraro says:

   February 11, 2008 at 10:41 am

   I’m glad to see someone on this planet was inspired by something I wrote. Thanks for the notoriety dude. Keep up the good storytelling.

   -MF

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2. OmegaRadium says:

   February 13, 2008 at 11:54 pm

   Thanks, I appreciate your comment man! Your drawings are pretty funny and greatly match your stories.

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